The times they are a-changin’.
This post seems to be older than 17 years—a long time on the internet. It might be outdated.
Step 1: Look up Apple Store Location at http://www.apple.com/retail/
Step 2: Go to Apple Store located in above step
Step 3: Get on laptop or desktop computer in Apple Store
Step 4: Get on Internet
Step 5: Enjoy!
Bonus Points: Find a chair
Update: Added picture
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